I never read the book, so I can’t judge, but expectations themselves? Not a fan!
When I google “expectations”, it says: a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future and also: a belief that someone will or should achieve something.
What is should say?: An evil idea in disguise, torturing it’s creator, in some cases for years and years and maybe: a single thought or wish that destroys relationships and every single birthday after 12.
As I sat alone, watching tv and folding laundry on yet, another, Friday night, I was suddenly depressed. But here’s the thing, I’m only depressed because it’s Friday night, the “expected” date night. I actually had an amazing day and could use a little down time! I had the day off, so I stayed in bed till I was good and ready, then got a few things for my new house, hit the tattoo shop with my girlfriend, worked on some content for my own business and even got hit on at the dollar tree. (yeah, I considered it).
So, really, what was my problem? If I found myself sitting and watching “Parent Trap” with my aging father for the 100th time, so what? Wasn’t I still on the brink of a brand new exciting business? And had the honor of being mom to 2 amazing kids that I genuinely have a ton of fun with, who make me laugh? I had my own new house that I loved, had dear friends coming over a totally fun game night the next day? Yes, my life is awesome! Perfect? No but I realized if this were Thursday night, I wouldn’t have thought twice about it. Ah, conditioning. Friday night=date night There it is.
Birthdays could be full of little surprises and presents from loved ones but because we had something in mind, or because we still had to go to work, it dampened even that enjoyment. And God forbid it be a milestone of some kind…oy! When we hit 30, 35 or 40, we think we should be somewhere specific, in our careers, relationships or financial picture so even though our family or friends work hard to throw us a really good time, we are deep down bummed out.
So how do we ditch the expectations that make us sad, no matter how sweet our current situation might be? I actually don’t have an answer here, spoiler alert, sorry about that. But like everything else I’ve discovered about myself, in the last 12 sober years I’ve spent actually looking, solutions begin with identifying the problem. So I expect there to be a Great Expectations Part II blog coming soon but in the mean time, if you have any ideas, you know where to find me!
